Every year for Lent I give up a bad habit of some sort. Typically, this results in spending more energy on finding and using a replacement behavior than on actually giving up the bad habit. This year I gave up feeling sorry for myself and I have to say, this is the first year that the first week of Lent has actually required a lot of energy to stop the negative behavior and to think of a positive replacement behavior. I'm not proud to say that feeling sorry for myself and bitter about some of the changes that have occured in my life during the last two years has become a very comfortable and familiar feeling.
One of the benefits of my career is that I am allowed the opportunity to hear about the struggles (large and small) that five to seven different people are facing on a daily basis. Some days, this does not feel like a blessing and I (like many therapists) leave the office feeling drained, tired, and generally hardened to the horrific realities of the world we live in. Then, there are days that remind me why I do what I do. Those days I am privy to witnessing small miracles; a child overcoming a debilitating fear, a teenager focused on getting into college or graduate school despite the extensive adversity they have faced, a couple finally feeling heard or accepted by each other. One of those days was responsible for this Lenten resolution and because hearing the stories of other peoples challenges and successes was responsible for my committment to this positive change, it seemed only fair that I then share this journey with you.
Dwelling on the reasons I have been feeling sorry for myself would mean that I spend an additional five minutes sitting in the space I have resolved to move out of so I will skip the background story and focus on replacement behaviors. This week I discovered three amazing replacement behaviors: yoga, baking (a little chocolate never hurt anyone, right?), and this podcast. One of my favorite yoga teachers often talks about the concept of "showing up". Not necessarily physically showing up to class (although that is a good place to start), but really showing up in anything and everything we have agreed to do. In our relationships, our practice, our jobs, convesations, even with ourselves, what does it really mean to show up? I have learned that, for me, this means to be fully present, to commit with integrity. In yoga (and almost any other physical activity I can think of) we experience that shaky feeling when we lean into a new pose, use a new muscle, or hold a stengthening position for an extended time. So often I shy away from that shaking assuming it is my bodys cry for a break. When this yoga teacher encouraged us to "show up" into that shaking, to feel strength developing as you breath through it, I felt empowered. Making the commitment to show up through the shakiness both in new (and sometimes scary) poses and life sittuations is a choice, which brings me to my second discovery. This podcast on The Smart Passive Income Blog is amazing and I highly recommend that you listen to it. I won't waste time recapping what this interview so perfectly describes, just listen. And while you listen, bake. Each time that I am really missing one of my dear friends, I have decided to bake or cook something that reminds me of them. These delicious chocolate cupcakes are an ode to endless nights walking 10 blocks in -10 degree weather for Sprinkles and speeding down Webster in Lincoln Park to arrive at Sweet Mandy B's a mere two minutes before they locked the door to get our fix.
Chocolate Cupcakes
These amazing little packages of chocolate goodness were adapted from this Barefoot Contessa, Beatty's Chocolate Cake recipe and this chocolate fudge frosting recipe from Baker By Nature. Simply adapt the baking time (15-18 minutes for large cupcakes, 10-14 minutes for mini cupcakes) and halve the frosting recipe.
Additonal informaiton: for this insanely simple frosting technique, I used this piping bag set from Crate and Barrel. I also picked-up these spring mini cupcake papers and these Easter cupcake papers at Crate and Barrel. Finally, I discovered the Smart Passive Income Blog podcast after reading about it on The Golden Girl Blog. Click here to read the complete list of her favorite sources for creativity and motivation!
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